I know that I am a good person, & I strive to be a selfless person.
Being a good person means that sometimes, you will be taken advantage of…unfortunately. I’ve battled internally with being who God created me to be, a good person, & who the world is trying to turn me into, someone who is not so good. By “not so good” I mean someone who is not a “giver”, & is cold-hearted & selfish, for example.
A part of me being a good person means that I also try to be selfless. I tend to primarily be concerned with other people more than I am concerned with myself. I take care of others before I take care of Anaston & a lot of my time is spent making sure that I am being “good” to those around me. Frequent thoughts revolve around questions like: How can I help this person? Can I give them my time? Are there any other “things” that I have to give? How can I make them happy?
I previously viewed being a good/selfless person as a personal problem. Why is it that I give so much of myself to others, & all people do is take? I am rarely on the receiving end of anything…& that has bothered me. So I often ask myself “why do I give?”. It is important that my intentions behind the things I do are genuine & not self-serving. Do I give to get something in return? No. Do I give just to be able to say I gave? No. Do I give because I don’t want what I have? No.
I give primarily because nothing that I have is mine. Yes, I have earned some things, worked for some things, I own some things, but none of it is mine. It all belongs to God. So who am I to not give what I have to someone else? This way of thinking is new to me, & it came to mind one Sunday during church. (In the bible, it’s referred to as “stewardship”. God owns everything, we simply take care of the things he has blessed us with.) Looking at it that way, it is easier for me to not to be so offended when someone only takes from me.
But I am learning that while it is great to be selfless, & it is great to be “good” to other people, it is even more important to be “good” to me. There has to be a healthy balance between my concern for those around me & the concern that I have for myself. I went through a period of time where I tried to be all about Anaston…& trust me, that neither worked for me nor did it last long. So now I’m trying to find that balance & create boundaries where I give of myself in a healthy way. I discuss how I am doing that in my post Take Care of Your Star Player.
Do you identify as a selfless/good person? How are you maintaining the healthy balance in your life? I think we all strive to be good human beings, but it is important to make sure that our actions & intentions are aligned. You cannot give to someone just for the bragging rights or because you expect something in return. Give because you can. Give because it is who you are. Give because you love. But be sure that when you give, you save some for you. It’s a bad feeling to wake up one day & realize that you have given so much of yourself & you have nothing left for you.